Krabjuice

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Revision as of 02:39, 1 May 2006

An often overlooked and forgotten resident of the CompSci.ca message boards. He prefers people to call him "Will" in coversation.

Origin of the name

At one point, Krabjuice was simply Crabjuice. Inspired by a Simpsons episode where the family traveled to Washington, the name Crabjuice was used as a elementary school codename. Alongside Kalkalash and D-Day (Crabjuice's childhood friends) the trio unleashed relentless terror and control over the local park swings. The names were adopted to protect their identities from being discovered by the "bigger kids." Over the next few years, the names Crabjuice and Kalkalash were used extensively in games like ThemeHospital and Interstate 76'. Eventually, he discovered Hotmail. After attempting to reserve the name Crabjuice, the name Krabjuice was coined. It stuck.

Childhood

Krabjuice met the aforementioned Kalkalash and D-Day at an unspecified date preceding his birth on October 13th 1988. Likely, he became aware of their presence sometime after the age of 2. Until the summer of 2002, the trio were often together. Krabjuice became self aware at age 3.

Gaming

Somewhere between his first memory, a penguin device, and a failed attempt to pre-order Sin Episodes, Krabjuice discovered hardcore gaming. Likely, during a fateful visit to his grandmother's, Krabjuice acquired an Nintendo Entertainment System. Over the next few years, his uncle regularly supplied various games including Super Mario 3, Double Dragon 2, and Paperboy.

Cont Death

With Kalkalash and D-Day's spiffy new Compac clocking in at a speedy 233Mhz, infinite gaming possibilities emerged. Duke Nukem, C&C Red Alert, and Interstate 76' were only a few of the many games the trio played in their youth. One day, Krabjuice decided to modify Interstate 76' 's Jefferson Sovereign; he painted it red, boosted armour, and attached 30mm cannons to each hard point. He also gave it a beefy v10 engine. From this machine was born Count Death, however, it was misspelled as Cont Death. To this day, Cont Death has never been destroyed. After falling from infinate heights, absorbing extensive damage, and surviving occasional "accidents," the Cont Death will continue to kick ass.

Snout

Kalkalash and D-Day simultaneously received wolf-like plush toys from an unspecified source. In response to their exaggerated noses, the Cult of Snout was formed. The metaphysical force, snout, is harnessed by a very nasal pronunciation of "Tee-tee-tee-tee" or "Snout".

Spraug

After the names of Kalkalash and Crabjuice lost their initital appeal, Spraug(derived from Leon Sprague, a character from a Clint Eastwood movie by the name of FireFox) was introduced. It was first used as the driver name in Interstate 76', but was later used in C&C RedAlert and C&C Tiberian Sun. Whenever Krabjuice plays any of these games, he always uses the name "Spraug."

StormHawk

Taken from StormFalcon and a short-lived obsession with Hawks, the call sign StormHawk was constructed. This name is Krabjuice's "default" game-name. He uses/used it for Unreal Tournament, CounterStrike, Natural Selection, Diablo 2, and StarCraft. However, he uses Krabjuice in most occasions.

Icarus

Inspired by the damn-freaky AI from Deus Ex, Icarus is Krabjuice's malicious alter ego. The name was first used under the guise of IcarusMJ12 (for Icarus was already reserved) for Krabjuice's MSN based scare tactics. He now uses the name whenever StormHawk or Krabjuice cannot be used--or when he feels like it.

CompSci

Krabjuice first graced the CompSci message boards on Dec 16th 2003. Although he left momentarially sometime in 2004-2005, he has returned.

Turing

His first "programming" language was Turing. He started his first program sometine in late 2003, and finished his last program sometime in 2005. Ambitious from the start, Krabjuice attempted to create a "realistic swaying grass simulator," but failed miserably. He moved up to an obsession with random numbers and whatdotcolor. He used both in a well recieved "air hockey" game. Although simplistic and essentially pong, the game accendentally proved to be quite enjoyable. With arched corner which the puck smoothly followed, a powerup system, simple AI and mouse control, the game proved to be remarkably successful. Krabjuice would later improve collision detection and add two player support.

Sometime later, Krabjuice also created a 3D box manipulation program in Turing. While not officially 3D, Krabjuice continues to argue that all computer generated 3D objects are simply 2D in an assumed 3D space.

During the summer of 2004, Krabjuice experimented with the System command. First, he created a "I am a Sex Machine" program that called up several pages from the Merriam Webster Dictionary website, then he designed the Execc program. Essentially a device used to open up various programs or call an explorer, Krabjuice used this program to do various things.

Krabjuice also built a self-executing "base" program. With some manual installation on his father's computer involving start-up scripts, the endless sound of "All Your Base Are Belong To Us" began to ring out through the house. Krabjuice later removed the program while wearing his "All Your Base Are Belong To Us" T-shirt.

Java

Lets face it, Turing blows. So, Krabjuice moved to Java. So far, Krabjuice has been using Java for over an year now, beginning in late 2005 and continuing through 2006. Although he built several simple programs, Krabjuice's first accomplishment was a temperature conversion program. Co-incidentally, this was also the first program in which he used a infinite loop.

Krabjuice now helps his teacher to tutor younger classes. He does this in exchange for a daily half-hour dose of Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis. He's still obsessed with loops, and quite recently, arrays and vectors. Currently, he is creating an overly elaborate Shmup style game with Eureka Seven flavouring.

Post Adolescent Elitism

After seeing the word "elitists" used while playing online Neverwinter Nights, Krabjuice has become convinced with his superiority. He often signs his name as "Overlord over all Humanity."